Hey gal! Welcome back to The Carolina Peach. This post is going to look much different than others, because I am sharing something a little more personal about how my 2019 year was for me; spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.
First, I would like to say that I am truly thankful for YOU. Those that show up every week to read a blog or show your love and support on Pinterest and Instagram. A space to curate posts and photos that demonstrate vulnerability, raw goodness of our everyday lives to inspire, fulfill, and encourage y’all to be unapologetically yourself. You are what makes this possible, so THANK YOU, SWEET GIRL!
At first, I was just journaling some thoughts about how I felt about this past year to prepare my mindset for 2020. It wasn’t until I listened to Rachel Hollis’ 2020 Instagram TV video that I felt inspired to share my own story about 2019 and the many successes and failures that came my way this past year.
Creation of The Carolina Peach
2019. What a year. A year full of laughter, happiness, sadness, growth, heartache, failures, challenges, breakthrough, and endless memories to last a lifetime. I am incredibly thankful for all this year has had to offer.
The beginning of 2019 looked a lot like every other year. I was working the same job, going to school for the same thing, and remaining comfortable in my relationship and friendships. I didn’t set a New Year’s resolution, because I truly was happy and content with what 2019 was going to offer.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I ABSOLUTELY love and adore Instagram. I love the way a simple photo can capture any moment at any time, and the creation of captions to help the photo come alive to reach so many that resonate as well. I was following many bloggers and influences at the time, and one of my best friends was totally rocking her recently new blog that she had created in 2018 – you can find her blog, HERE. I remember sitting in my apartment one night, scrolling on Instagram where I got a little nudge to create a website. I had no idea what the name of my website would be, or what I would use it for. I just knew that I wanted to curate posts and photos for others to love just like I was from their pages.
Shout out to EVERYONE who helped welcome the creation of THE CAROLINA PEACH this year. This website took off and reached so many across the country and world, and I have LOVED absolutely every part of it. Your support, engagement, and use of my affiliate links means the world to me.
Shortly into the year, I found myself attending Delight Ministries on campus. Delight is a ministry on campus for women looking for Christ-Centered community. I showed up every week and fell in love with the women, friendships, and Jesus. It wasn’t until I was in my Jesus time one night, worshiping, where i received the sweetest, scariest nudge from God to apply to become a leader of this ministry.
I spent that night resting in the word “I feel unqualified for what you’re calling me to do, but Lord with your strength, I’ve got no excuse. Because broken people are exactly who you use” – Sanctus Real: Confidence
As many of you know, who have been following my journey this past year – I accepted the position and spent majority of this year serving the community on campus at IUPUI with my bestest friends, creating Christ-Centered community.
Applied Behavior Analysis Therapy – RBT
Half way into the year, I accepted a position as a Fashion Specialist with francescas. Many were confused why I would accept a position for such little pay, but for me, there was something calling me to this position. 1 short month into working with this company, I was introduced to Damar Services. The rest is history.
I found a job that I love so dearly. I work with children who have been diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum Disorder as a Registered Behavior Technician. I found a job that prepares me for my career in Social Work. A career that seeks to provide hope to families, and joy to the community. This job has been a bridge to how I want to pursue this next decade, and I am eternally grateful for that.
The Truth about 2019
But, let me tell you something about 2019. I failed. I failed miserably. I failed to the point of where I wouldn’t be able to get back up. The point to where the game was over.
I lost hope in my blog – quit for a while. Became unmotivated for Delight – I didn’t go all in. I was drained emotionally and physically at my job – was unsure if this was truly for me. My relationship and friendships were looking a lot different than before. My depression and anxiety were at an all time high, and I was at an all time low. I failed, and I felt it greatly.
Wish for 2020
Friends, my wish for 2020 is times of failure. Times that push my limits where I will fail. Instances that make me feel like I cannot push through.
You’re probably wondering why this is my wish for 2020, but you see, Rachel Hollis and many others who are seen as successful and unsuccessful have a choice of how they respond to failure. The same goes for myself. I can fail forward, or I can fail backward. I can fail and choose to not get up, or I can get back up and try again.
The truth is, I’m not going to able to push my limits without failing. I’m not going to be uncomfortable without failing. I have big goals for 2020 and I’m not going to be able to reach those without the feeling of being uncomfortable and pushing my limits. Failure is going to give me an edge to make the decision to get back up. To try again.
It’s going to be a decision that shows others that you can get an undergrad degree in Psychology and still have a job that you love. To show others that a quiet, enneagram 3 can create a blog and find joy in pushing their limits – even when they don’t believe in themselves wholeheartedly. It looks like taking the Lord’s hand when he calls you to do something you would have never thought you could do.
It’s that reminder of feeling unqualified, but in reality – that is the lie the world and yourself is telling you. So, here’s to 2020 for lots of failure, getting back up, trying again, laughter, challenges, being extra, over the top, 12/10, giving it my all. Here’s to not making a resolution, but giving 2020 a word to resonate with EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
Exceptional: to a greater extent than the usual. Unusual; not typical
Thank you for reading the last post of 2019! I hope to see y’all in 2020 and look forward to doing life with you; Y’all, stay peachy!